Yet another test 

I barely slept last night. I was up late chatting to a fellow sick kid who has been newly initiated into the club. 

Its kinda nice having someone know how shit it is to be in limbo, but at the same time i wouldn’t wish it on anyone. 

I managed maybe a few hours but for the most part it was just little 10-20 minute doses. 

In my sleep deprived haze I looked up private ultrasound scans because I can’t stop thinking about how much that prodding hurt. If pushing on something causes pain, we should probably find out what that was and why. 

I emailed someone before the clinic was even open and got a phone call half an hour later. They had a slot at 11am and if I could get to Sutton Coldfield in time, the consultant could scan me.

So I did.

It hurt, as expected and much like every other test I’ve had done, it was all normal. I paid another chunk of money to once again get no further!

I really am starting to feel insane. 

How can there be nothing? The probe was pushing against my uterus and right ovary and it hurt like hell, yet the scan was normal. 

Where do I go from here? What hope is there now that absolutely no imaging shows anything abnormal?

I don’t know what else I can even do now


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